Clumsy + Bug phobia = Bad parenthood

I have officially claimed my rightful place as the most clumsiest person in the world. Well, atleast 'my' world. In the past like 4 days I've fallen over a lane line, ran into a wall at the mall, and I've stepped on a needle. Isn't it so weird how all the forces in the universe just seems to point it's leftover karma right at me? There was also this like big (non-related) family dinner (of course), and no one would let me help them do anything... I guess they're all jealous of my coordinated..ness...ity... If you put a boiling pot of chunky (questionable) tofu in my hands, do you really think I would drop it? Well I wouldn't INTENTIONALLY drop it. And I also have like a phobia of bugs... I just can't look at bugs or 'kill' them or TOUCH them. It's just so incredibly grotesque in my mind. You shoulda seen me when I was just a lil kid. I was running and screaming as I ran away from those friggin butterflies. Have you ever seen that episode of Spongebob where Sandy leaves and Spongebob and Patrick were scared of the butterfly? First of all, that episode scarred me for life, ESPECIALLY when they zoomed in on the butterfly O.O And second of all.... I set towns on fire too when I see ...ugh...bugs... Which all leads up to one thing.. I would be THE. WORST. PARENT. EVER. Like seriously... we depend on our parents to help us when we fall and squish the nasty bugs in our rooms...Well how am I supposed to do any of that? I'd be the one falling down and running away from the..ugh...bugs...So all those aspiring parents out there...GET A THERAPIST...AND HURRY!!