Turning over a new leaf

Here's something I always say: I'm gonna turn over a new leaf. I'm always claiming, that I'm gonna try and be a better person. I'm gonna act nicer, talk nicer, actually dress nicer! But it's so hard to change yourself, when you're so used to acting like a jerk, and dressing like a nerd. Every time I say I'm going to actually try, and hey, I do. But it only lasts for a couple of days, until people start judging you all over again, and you get that feeling where you're trapped in a cage at the zoo, with everybody laughing and pointing at you. Just because I don't wear clothes that are so tight on you, you can't even breath, people think I dress weird, just because I don't like listening to emo music, people think I have no taste in music, just because I like to write and read, people think I'm a nerd. Honestly I am a nerd though. I wanna be an individual. But if I'm changing so I can be like everyone else, then I'm not an individual. The only way I can actually successfully change myself, is if I want this for myself.